AttractionFormula.com - Part III: Conclusion and What We Learned

Seriously, at this point it doesn't even matter what this guy says.  The book is a whole lot of mumbo-jumbo about nothing.  But anyway:

The final sections of the book discuss how to handle this new playerdom.  Don't get too high, don't get too low.  Have a plan in case shit gets real i.e. a second girl showing up at your door while you're about ready to bang the first one.  Well, aren't we so lucky to have girls rapping at our door so often, Mr. Janka?  Also, he explains how to let a girl down easy or lock one up for a steady relationship.  Not that anyone reading this would want to be in a relationship.  Blasphemy!  I'm not even fully aware of his stance on relationships, but I'm pretty sure that right now he believes relationships are amateur hour.

He also has a pretty long section on obsession.  Not the wear-your-skin-around-the-house obsession, but the type where you pursue and pursue until it burns up and you can't understand why.  Hello, it's called normal life for most single men in their 30s.  Besides, I think it's the wrong word choice.  Obsession implies wicked craziness like in some terrible movie starring Ali Larter and Beyonce.  I think he just means preoccupation maybe.  It sounds much less creepy and desperate when you say preoccupation.  Though ultimately, it's not any better.  Oh, but the point is, as a player, you don't want to get to hung up on a girl that won't give you the goods.  Move on!

He finishes by listing eight consequences to the player lifestyle.  They are:

1.  Managing a reputation
2.  Moving beyond "Body Count"
3.  Leaving the sexy women alone
4.  Logistics and female menstruation
5.  Disease and pregnancy
6.  Loneliness
7.  Soiled linens
8.  Sexual ennui

Let's address each of these one-by-one.

1.  What reputation?  See, he is speaking from a level of national exposure, and he mentions as much in the book.  Most people don't give a shit about these guys, these players.  It's the whole "women talk" theory.  Let's not overstate how awesome these disciples of yours are, Janka.

2.  Probably a little insensitive to use the words "body count" to describe the amount of chicks you're raking in.  What he wants you to realize is that you need the slightest bit of emotional connection with these girls so you don't completely objectify them and ruin their opinions on men.  Dude, you used the words "body count".

3.  Leaving the sexy women alone!  I do this all the time.

4.  Ok, yeah, this section is fairly gross and not worth describing here.  I'm sure you could guess what he discusses in this section.  Keep that dry cleaner on speed dial.

5.  Through the whole book I never even thought of the biological impact of banging 100 chicks.  That's a loooooot of stuff being exchanged there.  And to think casual sex might lead to a little one on the way...with a girl you only wanted to strictly bang...yikes.  If anything, this section completely reverses the appeal of the book's entire premise.

6.  Loneliness.  Don't give me that shit, Janka.  Sure, deep down "players" experience loneliness.  But that's fugazi loneliness.  Come over to my place at 11pm on a Thursday.  You'll get a good sense of the real thing.

7.  This is what I'll name my next band.

8.  I don't really know what "ennui" means, but I think he's getting at having too much sex might mean it's not fulfilling anymore.  Some of us should be so lucky.


That's pretty much it.  So what did we learn?  Essentially nothing.  Not a damn thing.  Looking back at it, I don't even really remember his pointers in the first place.  He gives no advice on how to transition into a sheepish, timid idiot into player extraordinaire.  He just jumps into boring stuff, tells a few cool stories, and then finishes with boring stuff.  I would have no idea where to begin.  Great, I've wasted $20.  But I knew that was coming.

If you want to become a player follow this guy's lead.  He makes it sound glamorous and easy.  Then again, he makes women sound like pond scum.  We, as men, could have the world in the palm of our hand.  And then fuck it once it's there.  This is just the same type of bullshit any other online service is trying to sell you on.  All these dicks are the same.  They are good at what they do so you can be too!  Please.  You're probably rich by now because guys are desperate, horny assholes.  But don't act like you're providing advice out of the goodness of your heart.  You couldn't care less.  Now, I officially don't either.

I will leave you with this.  One final quote from the literary genius Paul Janka.  One final memento.  One lasting impression.  One shining moment:


"I had a scare around New Year’s. A very hot little stripper I met Halloween
finally came over and I banged her at a friend’s place. We had great sex, and I used a
condom. But, my tongue and fingers had been inside her ass, pussy and mouth and she’d
blown me without a condom several times. She looked clean."


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